It’s time to stop reading news again.

I do this about once a month or so, I stop going to news websites – they’re just too damn depressing. I’ll cheat a little and go to happynews.com but that’s about it. Radio or TV? Nope they’re banished from my realm as well. News is business and they have to sell it, so sensationalism and tragedy sell… and missing blondes get headlines, but missing guys like me don’t. Sure, people go missing everyday but when a cute blonde goes missing THAT’S news, America’s T&A is at stake here for Christ’s sake! Don’t get me wrong I feel horrible for her and her family, I don’t know what I would do if one of my kids or wife disappeared, and would be grateful for any and all coverage I could muster for their safe return. But enough is enough and it’s depressing. After a week or so my outlook will improve greatly proving the adage, “ignorance is bliss” - gimme bliss any day.

Today I learned that:

Copenhagen may move the city's famous Little Mermaid statue out of the reach of vandals and tourists. Sounds like a good idea, people just don’t know how to act anymore. “The statue has been beheaded twice. Its arm has been amputated. Hooligans have doused it in paint several times. Three years ago, vandals used explosives to blow its off its perch.” …nice. And here I thought Europeans were better behaved that us. Not too bad, but who knew?

A woman in Florida allowed a neighbor to molest her son for $600 in hush money. They’re preparing a special place in hell for her as you read this. What the hell is wrong with us when our children’s biggest advocates and protectors become their biggest threat? See my past post about God, seems relevant again, and again, and again, and again, and again.

Speaking of which: There was a movie trailer I saw a while ago for Bruce All Mighty. It began with the testosterone-filled voice talent asking, “What would you do if you had God’s powers for one day?” Well I sure as hell wouldn’t give Jennifer Anniston bigger tits, that’s for sure. (Brad may disagree, but then again I’m with Brad on this one - Angelina over Jennifer is a no brainer.) Good premise, crappy execution.

Given 24 hours to wield the power of God as I wished? Sweet. Anyone who would otherwise wake with the intent to kill to another would die in his or her sleep. I figure conservatively 10% of the world’s population would die that night. Anyone who has or will have molested a child, raped, abused the elderly, been cruel to an animal, fatal heart attack, prisons could just cement over the windows to become mausoleums. Lie and steal do you? Well not anymore searing migraines upon each infraction should convert you in a short spell. Pollute the environment? Cancer, unless you atone and clean the environment in proportion to your abuses. You get the picture…it’s time someone paid attention and began to wield absolute power for the victims.